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Cara Delevingne – Americas Least Wanted.

Cara Delevingne,newsmediaimages.com

Cara Delevingne is trying to establish herself as a big-ass actress. She’s currently on a promotional tour of America telling anyone who’ll listen that the film Paper Towns is her Oscar in waiting.

However when Cara appeared on Good Day Sacramento news anchors Marianne McClary, Ken Rudulph and Mark S Allen skipped past the “You’re so talented” part of the interview and cut straight to the “Why don’t you piss-off ” part instead.

Well that’s right everyone. These news anchors were having none of Cara’s, “I don’t know where my talent comes from but I’m living the dream” gush so they called her out and cut the interview short.

You can hear how it ended in the clip below.

If establishing herself as a household name in bitch-punching with a viral video to boot was Cara’s objective then she’s now a huge success. Everyone can enjoy a video like this one. It’s like a silent movie where Cara ties her career to a safe and then throws it off a roof.

I mean really. Right now Cara couldn’t be more disliked by America had she tipped an invalid out of a wheelchair.

Oh I don’t know it’s no big deal, if anything this video makes Cara Delevingne seem more human, which is something she lacks these days.

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Cecil The Lion – Rest In Peace.

Cecil the Lion,murdered, Newsmediaimages.com

Walter Miller got a little bored with dentist-ing in Minnesota so he swapped a day pulling teeth for a day killing, skinning and then beheading Cecil the Lion, Africa’s largest cat.

If you can understand why someone wants to be a dentist in the first place then you’ll understand why all kinds of cruel are possible. Ask Walter, he knows all about cruelty, barbarity, brutality and savagery.

Yes, good old Walter Miller. He paid £35,000 to a local game hunter to help him lure Cecil the Lion away from the sanctuary of the Hwange National park in Zimbabwe. Together they dragged a dead animal behind their Jeep and Cecil the Lion followed them. That’s the equivalent of a two pedophiles driving an ice cream van.

Once they were away from the park, Walter Miller took a bow and arrow and then shot Cecil the Lion with it.

You definitely don’t want Walter as your dentist because when Walter fired his bow and arrow he failed to hit any of Cecil the Lion’s vital organs. So Cecil the Lion died a slow and painful death. Like one of those deaths you see in a PETA video.

Well now everyone is pissed off to hell. The Zimbabwe government, social media, Demi Moore, Ricky Gervais, Russell Brand and of course every newspaper on Earth.

Everyone wants Walter Miller’s ass hunted down and spanked. Twitter is running a boycott of Miller’s dental practice. And Joanna Lumley has poured a breakfast vodka in memory of poor Cecil the former lion. And I’m in tears.

So here we are…. one click away from Africa’s larget lion. Rest in Peace, Cecil the Lion.

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Katie Hopkins and Euthanasia Vans.

Katie Hopkins,Euthanasia,Elderly,newsmediaimages.com

The Katie Hopkins cultural pollution tour continues. This week it visited the Radio Times. In a sparklingly stupid interview Mrs Hopkins said that she is “super-keen on euthanasia vans” as there are “far too many old people” still living in Britain today.

In the interview with Michael Buerk, our attention seeking hate troll was asked what she would do “If Katie Hopkins ruled the world”.

Her response?

“Right… We just have far too many old people. It’s ridiculous to be living in a country where we can put dogs to sleep but not people.

The solution is easy. Euthanasia vans – just like ice-cream vans – that would come to your home… It would all be perfectly charming. They might even have a nice little tune they’d play. I mean this genuinely.

I’m super-keen on euthanasia vans. We need to accept that just because medical advances mean we can live longer, it’s not necessarily the right thing to do.”

(Via: Radio Times)

I don’t know what to say. Really I don’t. Katie Hopkins is running out of things to lose at. Just the sight of her contrived demonic face (see above) instinctively makes you want to locate the neighbourhood children and confirm their safety.

Hopkins is known for being a ton of shit who receives extensive media coverage because the nation overwhelmingly hates her. She is the perfect pin-up girl for the psychotically insane.

It should be interesting to see who Mrs Hopkins hate slaps in her weekly column in the Sun this week. It’s due out on Friday.

Or is it?

Maybe after this Mrs Hopkins’ time as a Sun columnist will be brought to an end. After all no newspaper can stand idly by while an evangelical style redneck alienates it’s entire readership.

Who knows, we’ll have to wait and see but don’t worry Mrs Hopkins, you’ll be ok, Kim Jong Un probably needs a few new pastors over in North Korea.

Source: Guardian

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Lord Sewel Had Lofty Sex With BBC Star.

Lord Sewel,coke,bbc,presenter,adultery,newsmediaimages.com

The Sun newspaper has discovered the cause of earthquakes at the House of Lords: Lord Sewel, slutty women, adultery and fornication. And you thought it was shifting tectonic plates? Oh, silly you.

In their latest tale of rough tumble and sleeze the Walmart of the newspaper industry has continued to report on that hobbit looking coke fiend, Baron Buttifant Sewel.

Today they’ve revealed how the 69 year-old peer of the realm claimed that he humped a married BBC star on a dirty old mattress in his attic.

The paper writes:

Lord Sewel spotted a married BBC star on TV as he romped with two hookers and bragged: “I had her in the attic.”

The disgraced peer made the claim during a cocaine-and-sex party at his rent-protected flat

Sewel, 69, calmly blurted out, “I f***** her”, before making his attic boast to the call girls. 

He first spilled the beans two years ago — but the topic came up again last Wednesday as he enjoyed drug-fuelled sex games at his home in Pimlico, central London. 

Married Sewel was so eager to talk of his adultery, he even spelled out the name of his famous lover. 

He described the alleged tryst as a “one-off shag” — because “she was happily married”. 

He also proudly revealed the programme she works on.

The Sun last night approached the woman named by Lord Sewel as his lover. She said: “This is categorically untrue.”

Because the lady has denied all knowledge of the event she therefore remains unnamed.

I mean wot! A BBC presenter refusing to talk about an auspicious event in history other than to deny that it ever took place? This is exactly why politics, newspapers and the BBC need to be kept apart.

Seriously, there can be nothing worse than a BBC presentress who needs to be reminded of the underlying principles of her chosen trade. And yes, I do understand why a ‘former journalist’ would prefer to interview a peer of the realm over a free coq au vin rather than have to suck his nuts in an attic. But still.

Because the lady in question has plenty of chums in the legal profession who will feign interest in any publisher who fails the reasonable persons test and inadvertently names their client, I won’t even suggest to you who she is. No sir. Not a word.

In the meantime Lord Sewel continues to own this scandal like a poster boy for sexually incompetent pensioners. Tally Ho Woof!

Bobbi Kristina Has Died.

Bobbi Kristina-rip,newsmediaimages.com

Whitney Houston’s daughter, Bobbi Kristina Brown is now in heaven. Yesterday afternoon Bobbi Kristina took the hand of an angel and was led up through the clouds to be reunited with her mother in the place of eternal peace. Bobbi Kristina died peacefully at the Peachtree Christian Hospice in Duluth, Georgia. She was just 22.

At the end of January, her brother/husband/boyfriend, Nick Gordon found Bobbi Kristina laying face down in a bathtub. She was rushed to hospital and put on a life support machine. Later she was placed in an induced coma. Bobbi Kristina stayed at the hospital for the next two months before her devastated family moved her to a rehabilitation center.

Last month, Bobbi Kristina was moved into a hospice after doctors said there was nothing more they could do and that her condition was getting worse. The family then took her off all medication.

The District Attorney has reportedly been investigating Nick Gordon, because he thinks Nick may have had something to do with why Bobbi Kristina lost consciousness lost in the first place. In a lawsuit Bobbi Kristina’s conservator has accused Gordon of stealing her money, physically abusing her and pretending to be her husband.

The Houston family said that Bobbi Kristina was surrounded by her family when she floated away to heaven. They released this statement.

“She is finally at peace in the arms of God. We want to again thank everyone for their tremendous amount of love and support during these last few months.”

Rest in peace, Bobbi Kristina.

ecommerce product photographyjWith ecommerce product photography, there is an essential need to both convey a product’s value and functionality whilst also inspiring customers to buy it. Where possible, it’s also important that product images are lean and able to load quickly.

This creates a challenge to produce high quality, attractive images that are also of a relatively small size. Although it’s not always an easy task to create a great quality image that is of a small file size, some of the world’s biggest retailers manage to do the job perfectly, meaning that it can be achieved with the right tools.

Image Compression Tools
There are a range of image compression tools available both free and paid. Whilst some of these tools are software that needs to be downloaded to and installed on a PC computer or laptop, others can be run entirely on the internet. A simple search for image compression tools on a search engine such as Google or Bing will yield a host of results, such as TinyPNG which is online-based, or Trimage , which is downloadable software that works on both Windows and Linux OS.

Photo Processing Software
Arguably the current best software for photo manipulation, Adobe Photoshop also includes a new and improved image generator designed for web developers. In the past, many web designers who utilised the tools provided by versions of Adobe Photoshop would use the ‘save for web’ option in order to ensure that their images were of the best possible quality at the lowest size available. Whilst this option is still available for those who prefer to use it, the new image generator creates better results of preparing images for use on the web and will output smaller files for the same compression level.

Photo Processing Scripts
Using a photo processing script may be one of the most effective and efficient ways to optimise a product image for both fast loading and appearance. Almost every programming language offers some kind of image processing, typically as a library. Whilst using these scripts or libraries often requires technical web developing skills, they are not hard to use once you have mastered the basics, and are capable of producing excellent results.

Camera Use
Although it is necessary to use some form of photo manipulation or image compression software to make your image suitable for use of the web once it’s taken, you can also make it easier to prepare your image for web use by adapting the settings on your camera accordingly. There are a range of cameras available which are able to take high quality images at low file sizes, so whether you take your own images or use a professional photographer from a company such as Fashot, it’s a good idea to ensure that your photographs are easy to manipulate for web use when you’re taking them.

Are you a web developer who’d like to add to the above list? Which method do you use, and why do you recommend it? We’d love to hear from you in the comments.

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