First off. HIDS would like you to know that she prefers to be referred to as Significant Other. Second thing. She has chosen this week of all weeks to detox me from all the good stuff, the sweet nectar, my Pinot Grigio and her fried lard.
This was a bad decision because SO’s program (designed by a London cardiologist and The Daily Mail) is giving me detox screams that sound like mice squeaks. It’s keeping me awake.
It’s 0500 and I’m wondering if, like me Kerry Katona has screamed herself awake this morning. Closer Magazine are reporting how Kerry started her detox regime over a month ago and in order to check that her body isn’t just a Mancunian lump of lies and doughnuts they’ve had her in the studio with her clothes off.
The picture you’re looking at is a stone lighter apparently.
Here’s an extract from Kerry’s interview.
‘After having four kids, I’m not confident about my belly. When Max was born in 2008, I was offered liposuction for a TV show – and I think I’d have it all if I could get it for free.
‘In the past few weeks, my arms have become super toned. I feel like Arnold Schwarzenegger… but I still hate my stomach. If I could afford it, I’d have a tummy tuck.’
( Via Mailonline/Closer Magazine)
So this is the work of liposuction. She should have pulled her hair up a bit tighter, her tummy would have tightened up but then it would have been on her shoulders. It’s a dilemma.
Clearly Significant Other has got my detox program ALL wrong. I say we should shun exercise, eat little, drink a lot, and have a body waxer, make-up artist, bottom bleacher and plastic surgeon on hand to deal with the rest.
At least that way I could sleep at night.
{ 6 comments }
Yes everyone stop eating. It’s not good for you.
They do an article on her for losing a STONE? Seriously?! That’s about 6.5kg. I lost 10kg over the summer. It ain’t that hard. A bit of running and stop eating chips normally does it. Crikey, that girl’s got something clearly magical if they’re doing articles that bland.
Kerry Katona: This is How They Detox Cannibals >>> http://t.co/bSKwrPJE Pls RT
yes the way forward Anthony, the only way. We could spend all the money go bankrupt and still look a million dollars !
Kerry Katona: This is How They Detox Cannibals >> http://t.co/bSKwrPJE Pls RT
Let’s get fat then get paid to lose it some gullible magazine
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