Does anyone know why the tabloids are trying to make Leandro Penna the next happening thing because I don’t. Frankly I’m ignoring his tacky mess because the last thing I need is some delusion-wrapped therapist trying to knock some reason into my head. However, this story from The Mirror is making me change my mind…..
When you break from a fluffy piece of air like Katie Price there are withdrawal symptoms, they include constipation, dizziness, bad breath and of course, exposing your insane screwed up life to the world. With this in mind, I have to wonder at how easily Leandro seems to have pulled that stunning little tramp from Big Brother, Sara McLean. And so damned quickly too.
According to the Mirror the pair met last week at Chloe Sims‘ book launch in Essex. There’s an oxymoron in there somewhere but no matter, can you imagine how messy that party must have been. Somehow Leandro’s managed to swap numbers with Sara while all around them were stumbling about with their heads full of foolish, sweaty hair in their faces and shouting “I LOVE YOU” at the top of their voices.
I find (from personal experience) that when I’m standing in the middle of a party surrounded by salopes all thinking they’re the dogs, the only thing I want to do is down an entire bottle of Grey Goose. If by the end of the night I haven’t found a trick sober enough to drive me to home then I do what all smart-thinking sluts do. I drag myself to the nearest Maccie Dee’s and face plant my head into a stack of morning pancakes until I’m good to go.
So, hats off to Leandro for showing all of us messy lazy whores how to hip hump the heat out of a dancing has been.
Meanwhile, guess who’s still at large?