This is going to be a mess. Here are the rumoured house mates for Celebrity Big Brother 2013. Rylan Clarke, Jim Davidson, Gillian Taylforth, Ryan Moloney, Sam Robertson, Tricia Penrose, Heidi Montag, Spencer Pratt, Frankie Dettorri and…. Lacey Banghard. (???? !!!!)
If you just said, “Who’s Lacey Banghard” well, (obviously) that’s her above. For further information on Lacie’s raison d’être you can educate yourself further >> here (nsfw).
Because my sense of everything hasn’t matured past the age of 13, I think that Lacey Banghard (that’s “Oh yes please Miss Bang Hard” for short or “Miss Messy Hussy Bangs Hard Like A Wounded Rattlesnake” for long) should win a gold medal for the best name to ever appear on Celebrity Big Brother.
Some people have been saying that Lacey’s parents did her wrong by naming her Banghard, but I’m saying the opposite. Why wouldn’t you give your daughter a gold medal-winning name like Banghard? If my surname was Banghard, then I’d have loads of kids JUST so I could name them Allota Banghard, Ava Banghard, Bett A Banghard and so on…
…. then to find the government have put me on their DO NOT LET THIS BITCH ADOPT ANYTHING list.
Celebrity Big Brother starts Jan 3rd.