When you first see a picture of Jim Davidson’s cherished mug-shot, you’ll know to scratch another name on the wall of suspected sex offenders, because he’s been arrested. And at this rate I think you’re going to need a fresh new wall very soon.
Everyone’s reporting that darlin’ Jimmy was taken away from Heathrow airport last night in hand-cuffs so that he could speak to police about his involvement in some suspected sexual offences back in the 80’s. Jim was arrested because the police believe that 25 years ago he may have had “tea and crumpets” with two women. And by “tea and crumpets” I think the police mean, “Ate a hamster in a less than legal way”.
Apparently, the police have a ……. (sorry, for legal reasons, no they don’t) which they found during…(no they didn’t)
What more is there to say about this? Davidson wasn’t charged with shit, was released on bail and probably regrets adding “The Jimmy Savile witch-hunt is going a bit silly now” to his blog back in October.
However, Jim’s solicitor Henri Brandman had this to say:
“Two women have made allegations in respect of Jim that date back approximately 25 years.
“The complainants were then in their mid 20s. Jim vigorously denies the allegations.”
I mean, it’s not like Jim has seen the inside of a jail cell more times than his asshole’s seen a piece of toiler paper. Although, that’s not saying much nowadays because it won’t be long before they’re throwing a damned reunion party every time another ‘face’ gets arrested. Everyone gets to catch up!
Yes, the cops must be cheering and hugging each other every time another suspected BBC pedophile comes stomping through the front door of a police station, arm in arm with a solicitor.
That was the good news, now for the bad.
As many had suspected Jim had flown into Heathrow from Dubai yesterday, not to visit a local police station, but to make his debut in Celebrity Big Brother instead. (starts on C5 tonight!)
However after yesterday’s adventures Jim is now in a pub somewhere in south west London,
with his face underneath a urinal as he drowns his sorrows under a gallon of because Chanel 5 have told him that they are cutting all ties with him.
An unnamed spokesman for the show has told the Daily Mirror that it was all “for the best” and that “everyone agreed.”
I hardly watch this Celebrity Big Brother mess, but it’s still a sad day in television history. We were so close to getting an episode with Jim finding new ways to lick cream off that soulless beast, Lacey Banghard.
I’ll have to start watching Eastenders again. No. No. No.