Whenever I see people making out in public, the bitter ass side of me mumbles ‘get a room’ before sinking itself into a cheap bottle of Pinot. But somehow this picture of Prince Harry and Cressida Bonas hugging each other on the pistes of Verbier isn’t bothering me. It’s kind of romantic..cute?
Sources say that society model Cressida has fallen seriously in love with Prince Harry. They say that he’s the love of her life and she’s happy to be his leading lady in the Royal romance of the year.
Oh what am I saying, that is just a sickening sweet mess I wrote there. I’ve finally sunk so low that my droopy ass is dragging on the floor. Congratulations to us all. I think the royal holiday spirit has wrecked my brain.
I’ll start again.
Cressida Bonas has been rubbing her mystery parts over Prince Harry’s Quasimodo face for some time, but he has never declared his love for her! Until now. This isn’t surprising since Harry would probably fall in love with a dehydrated camel toe if he stared at it long enough and a Taylor Swift song was playing in the background.
You’re probably thinking, “But why are the media airing this Royal love in public?” Haven’t they been threatened with the tower if they reveal even the tiniest glimpse behind the veil of royal privacy? We deserve an explanation for this!
Well err, that’ll be because Harry and Cressida are NOT England’s first couple meaning privacy only applies to Diana’s eldest son.
I’m frowning. I’m frowning because this is just another chapter in the book of double standards. Strangely enough when I frown my puckered lips kind of look like a camel toe… when it’s about to stampede.