The Saatchi Strangler Says Nigella’s So Divorced She Doesn’t Even Know It.

The Saatchi Strangler, Charles Saatchi,Nigella Lawson,Divorced,Statement,newspaper,MOS, throttled,throat,pictures,scandal,The marriage between The Saatchi Strangler and Nigella Lawson is dead, long live marriage. Charles has told The Mail on Sunday he’s divorcing her because she didn’t stand by him in front of the media.

Charles’ lack of shame exceeds all expectations as he didn’t bother to call Nigella or tell her to her face that they’re getting a divorce, he let her find out from a newspaper. In his statement to the MOS he totally denies that Nigella is a battered wife and claims that she has tried to throttle him during fights too.

On the day the now infamous strangling pictures were published, The Saatchi Strangler says Nigella’s PR advisor told him to apologise for the assault and admit that he was ‘ashamed’. The paper says he flew off the handle before screaming at his wife: ‘Are you crazy, you know that’s not the truth.’ They then had another furious bust up because Charles felt like Nigella had chosen her publicist over him.

But what got The Saatchi Starangler really mad was that Nigella totally refused to tell the press that he’d never hit her. And that’s why he threw her out of HIS house. Says Charles.

Here’s the full statement:


A source told the MOS that Nigella didn’t like Charles calling his strangling ways a“playful tiff” so she didn’t want to her PR to issue any words of support for him, that would make it look like she was covering up for his ass.

The MOS ‘source‘ went on to say:

Nigella has given a statement to the police that Charles has never hit her and she hoped it would be widely reported but it wasn’t. She is deeply private and doesn’t want to make any statement herself or have ­people pick over her marriage.

She thinks the pictures are very humiliating. She’s embarrassed and ashamed that she is being portrayed as a victim of domestic violence and her husband as a wife beater.

If only he’d said in the first place that the pictures were horrific and he was very ashamed, she says she could have pointed out that he’d never hurt her.

(Via: Mail On Sunday)

And there you have it. One piece of trash millionaire using a newspaper to tell his wife he’s divorcing her ass and it’s ALL HER FAULT! I swear Mel Gibson must be shaking his head in disgust at the cowardice of it all.

Anyway, here’s the cartoon version of this messy business, the dogs’ the media.  

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