If the Queen touches you with her crusty palm, it’s considered terribly important. Even if it’s just to pass you a note that says she killed Diana and blames herself for her grandson being gay. Of course, Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn knows this.
So. What’s this nonsense all about then. It all started this morning with The Daily Mail (who else) accusing Jeremy Corbyn of ‘snubbing’ HM Queen.
Imagine that. Snub. To snub, rebuff, ignore, spurn disdainfully, an act of rebuffing or ignoring someone. A Royal snubbing? Oh Daily Mail, you’re sooooo urban dictionary.
Anyways, apparently Jeremy Corbyn has refused to attend a ceremony (later today) where he was due to join the hallowed Privy Council.
I think we all recognise that Jeremy Corbyn is not only the leader of the Labour party, a beard wearer and a man who would never unwittingly set off a nuclear bomb with a mobile phone given to him by a Jihadist, he’s also a staunch republican.
Essentially that means there’s no way on God’s green Earth that Jeremy Corbyn is going to kneel in front of the Queen, kiss her hand and then swear a subservient oath about his undying love for and his allegiance to the monarchy.
Naturally a spokie for Jeremy Corbyn said that his boss could not attend due to a ‘clash of diaries’, but he would not say what diarised muddle mix malarky actually caused this mess.
Me? I don’t blame Mr Corbyn for this, not one bit. After all who wants to stand around with your trouser leg rolled up while those around you discuss how best to garage their fleet of Bentleys and chatter on about how little they know about the whereabouts of their children.
The Privy council may serve the purpose of allowing HMQ to be seen with important political figureheads without having to fake smile her way through an insufferable state dinner but who needs to attend an event where you’re forced to fire your chief of wardrobe for failing so miserably.