Thumbnail image for Russian TV:  Touch-A-Car Punch-A-Woman.

Russian TV: Touch-A-Car Punch-A-Woman.

December 7, 2014 Celebrity

If, even for fun you’ve made a list of female celebrities who deserve a punch in the face then you’d better tear that list up. Shred it and tear up the shreds because there’s nothing funny about a woman being punched. Leona Lewis got punched in the face once while signing copies of her new book. Not […]

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Thumbnail image for No Words: Funny Video 05th December 2014

No Words: Funny Video 05th December 2014

December 5, 2014 Celebrity

I once saw a stripper fire a ping-pong ball…. I’ll stop.   Tweet

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Thumbnail image for Say Something Nice: Desert Island Discs.

Say Something Nice: Desert Island Discs.

December 5, 2014 Celebrity

Honoured. It’s not everyday that NMi gets a request to post something about a broadcasting institution like Desert Island Discs. Yesterday the Speakers Corner bureau in London asked us to do just that. They sent an e-mail requesting we ‘Say Something Nice’ about the most iconic radio program that’s ever been broadcast. On 11th November 2014 Desert Island Discs, Britain’s longest running radio show aired […]

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Thumbnail image for Ola Jordan’s Boobs Were Not Enough – Leaving Strictly.

Ola Jordan’s Boobs Were Not Enough – Leaving Strictly.

December 4, 2014 Celebrity

Ola Jordan is leaving her gig on Strictly Come Dancing. According to the ever reliable Sun newspaper, Ola’s contract isn’t being renewed because she’s a diva who hates the BBC and is asking for too much money. That all seems fairly logical to me. Ola’s fall back position is a new reality show on Channel Four. It’s called The Jump […]

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Thumbnail image for Michelle Is Depressed.

Michelle Is Depressed.

December 3, 2014 Celebrity

It’s not easy being Michelle Keegan. I mean, yes, it’s probably easy being rich, famous and beautiful. But having time reminding her she’s slowly getting older, well that part probably sucks. Last night after watching the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show Michelle responded like all sad girls do —  she took to Twitter and told her fans just how depressed the pictures of those […]

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Thumbnail image for Milly Mackintosh Wears Her Underwear Better Than Anyone.

Milly Mackintosh Wears Her Underwear Better Than Anyone.

December 3, 2014 Celebrity

A woman never looks more beautiful than when she’s gazing into a camera wearing only her underwear. Her thoughts swirl deep into the lens. Her dreams. Her eyes. The windows to her soul. Oh I hear you, Milly Mackintosh wears her underwear better than anybody else. Last night she flashed her flesh coloured Spanx to an audience on Instasham. This is what Milly does best. It’s her doorway to getting paid. […]

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Thumbnail image for Cara Delevingne and Kendall Jenner Make Great Lesbians.

Cara Delevingne and Kendall Jenner Make Great Lesbians.

December 3, 2014 Celebrity

I don’t want to have too many rainbow painted eggs thrown at my house this weekend, but I’m pretty sure that hot young models swing both ways. It’s the fashion. On the other hand gay men are stuck with boring old zips and dicks. This leaves a lot of magazine space for Kendall Jenner and Britain’s […]

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Thumbnail image for Tom Cruise Bullied By London Bus. Video. Watch.

Tom Cruise Bullied By London Bus. Video. Watch.

December 2, 2014 Celebrity

Tom Cruise has reportedly reached such an advanced level in Scientology that he now has total power over the physical universe. He can bend the minds of men. And machines. And also animals. Here’s my money Tom. Point me toward the e-meters. I don’t mean to sound sceptical but if Scientology can turn someone like […]

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Thumbnail image for Russell Brand: Rent-a-Rant.

Russell Brand: Rent-a-Rant.

December 2, 2014 Celebrity

Whenever I see the wondrous beard bubble that is Russell Brand I get an overwhelming desire to take a hot shower. But not today. Why not today? Well it’s like this. Today is the first day in my entire life that I’ve found myself in full agreement with something that Russell has had to say. Here’s why. Because […]

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Thumbnail image for Madonna Topless.

Madonna Topless.

December 2, 2014 Celebrity

Madonna’s lady parts turned 56 this year and to celebrate their wondrous beauty she stripped off for fashion magazine Interview. And yes, her 13th studio album is due out any day now. This picture doesn’t even look real to me. I’m sure Madge made Interview’s photographer break every bone in his hands Photoshopping her naked […]

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Thumbnail image for White Dee: Reality TV Kills Another Marriage.

White Dee: Reality TV Kills Another Marriage.

December 1, 2014 Celebrity

While I was away on business and suckling Dom Pérignon (Cava) in my hotel room my partner in blog foolery, Celebrity Shade was here planting her seeds of noxious devilment. She was the perfect piece of trash for the job. Well now I’m back and what better way for me to thank the redoubtable CS than with this post about two members of […]

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Thumbnail image for Shia LaBeouf – Whipped And Raped By Unknown Woman.

Shia LaBeouf – Whipped And Raped By Unknown Woman.

November 28, 2014 Celebrity

It’s been reported that in a bizarre email exchange with Dazed Digital Shia LaBeouf claimed he was whipped and raped by a woman who visited his #IAMSORRY art show earlier this year. Here’s a snippet. “One woman who came with her boyfriend, who was outside the door when this happened, whipped my legs for ten minutes and then […]

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Thumbnail image for Michelle Keegan: The World is Round, The World Is Orange.

Michelle Keegan: The World is Round, The World Is Orange.

November 28, 2014 Celebrity

I can’t believe people are still bitching about the use of self-tanner in magazine photos. There’s isn’t a single glossy published in the last decade that hasn’t touched up a celebrity. (<— Yes I know how that reads.) Going au-natural died a long time ago, before any of us were even born. Nowadays even a middle-aged […]

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