David Beckham

David Beckham: Would You Hit It? (part2)

by Mike D.W February 5, 2013

When I heard that these pictures on David Beckham’s Facebook had melted over 170,000 G-strings it gave me a reason to take a trip over there to see that soggy mess for myself. And lordly lordy hallelujah what is one to do now? Clearly, another Would You Hit It post, it’s that or type myself to sleep [...]

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Heat’s New Hot.

by Mike D.W January 22, 2013

Lateral thinking question for you. Lucie’s been in the basement mixing up the medicine, David’s sitting on the pavement thinking about the government and the man with the hot badge says a big thank you to everyone. What happened? Come on, anyone with glittering hair-gel in their bag knows that I’m talking about Lucie Cave, the esteemed editor [...]

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Today’s Would You Hit It. David Beckham.

by Mike D.W November 9, 2012

A gay friend once told me that watching David Beckham chew on a banana is a magical and spiritual experience for some people. Yes, I had trouble swallowing my own saliva too but it’s not something I’m about to add to my bucket list. Beside’s David’s Minnie Mouse voice breaks boners. After David released this piping hot picture (above) from his [...]

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Trolls: Katherine Jenkins Calls In Police After The Trolls Issue Death Threats.

by Mike D.W August 26, 2012

Last Friday Mark Parker told Katherine Jenkins that he couldn’t believe I’d bothered my dumb-ass by writing this article about her. It was the same day that Katherine had taken to Twitter and denied that she’d ever had an affair with David Beckham. Well Mark you were right, I was a twit. I should never [...]

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Katherine Jenkins: What Comes Before “OH No They Didn’t” ?

by Mike D.W August 24, 2012

The rumor that Katherine Jenkins had an affair with David Beckham first said “Hello World” in the USA back in June so I can’t understand why Katherine’s taken this long to get so upset about it. As one wag tweeted earlier, “Katherine Jenkins must be the only female on the planet who’d deny she’s slept [...]

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What’s This? Becks Performing A Flaming Ball Trick At Opening Ceremony?

by Dolly Molly July 26, 2012

David Beckham is rumoured to be lighting up something tomorrow night’s Olympic Opening Ceremony. Becks has confirmed that he will have a big part to play in the 2012 curtain-raiser. The rumor is that Goldenballs will perform some of his ball skills, one of which will be with a flaming football. However David won’t confirm [...]

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David Beckham’s Olympic Role Revealed.

by Mike D.W July 24, 2012

You always knew that David Beckham was going to have a role at the Olympics because Lord Coe said so. Becks’s role has now been revealed, his job is to man the Official Olympics photo booth and try to scare people. Yes, just outside the Olympic park is The Westfield Centre with an Official Olympics [...]

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Spice And Becks to Perform at Olympics.

by Dolly Molly July 22, 2012

According to Dean Piper at The Sunday Mirror Victoria Beckham has become “the driving force” behind the Spice Girls Olympic gig. Dean’s sources told him she was heartbroken that her husband David was not getting a call-up for Team GB, so she has decided that one way or another ‘Brand Beckham’ will be making it’s [...]

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Posh Beckham Brings Her Signature Smile To Wimbledon

by Mike D.W July 8, 2012

It’s really hard out there for a Posh Beckham. I mean really! Being made to sit her ass in the strictly NO FATTIES zone at Wimbledon while maintaining the miserable parched look on her face. Can’t be easy. Me? I’m drunk-blogging from Henman Hill with a towell over my head because of the damned rain. That’s [...]

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Where’s Posh Beckham?

by Mike D.W July 5, 2012

Every wedding anniversary David and Victoria Beckham re-write their vows in the same glitter love syrup that dripped off the words the whispered to each other way back in 1999 at Luttrellstown Castle whilst they were sitting on those infamous thrones. Today, The Sun newspaper are wondering what’s happened to Mrs Beckham because on her [...]

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David Beckham With Pie-n-Mash and Charlize Theron.

by Mike D.W May 30, 2012

I think we all know how The Beckhams are constantly empire building. If their current aim is to appeal to the tastes of pot-heads, alcoholics, unemployed, brain-addled pop culture NMI.com readers or the junk food addicted demographic then there’s some work to do yet. David posted this picture (above) of he and his Mum shoveling pie -n-mash [...]

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David Beckham: White House Security Should Be Tightened.

by Mike D.W May 16, 2012

Yes, that’s what’s going on here. Staring. That’s a completely reasonable explanation (that did not come out of my bong) for why David Beckham has a serious problem. You will lose all the feeling in your eyeballs from staring so maybe David blinks too. Morse code through blinking, that way he won’t have to speak, [...]

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Becks Is Killing Us.

by Mike D.W May 3, 2012

Since I consider myself the epitome of restraint here’s a few hilariously awkward pictures of David Beckham. Becks will feature in Elle Magazine’s July issue and will become the first solo man to ever grace their cover. Understandably Elle are making a bit of a fuss about it. Elle’s press office have released a behind the scenes [...]

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