Kim Kardashian

Thumbnail image for Kim Kardashian: The Fifth Estate Must Try Harder.

Kim Kardashian: The Fifth Estate Must Try Harder.

November 19, 2014 Celebrity

Well I guess there’s nothing else going on today except the glittering diamanté that is Kim Kardashian. Technically this woman is the perfect embodiment of a rapper’s trash toy but buying into the Christmas fragrance of this moronic midget isn’t something I’ll be doing this year. Kim knows that over the Christmas period the soft-brained of this world will be buying […]

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Thumbnail image for Now Kim Kardashian Looks Like A Horses Ass.

Now Kim Kardashian Looks Like A Horses Ass.

November 12, 2014 Celebrity

Somewhere between refusing to state the obvious and stating the completely unfounded there’s a happy medium that nobody in print journalism seems to want to find. I’m looking at you @piersmorgan. I’m really not sure why the mainstream media are such complete pussies when it comes to their writing style, but it’s probably playing a large factor in their demise. […]

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Thumbnail image for Kim Kardashian Has Broken The Internet.

Kim Kardashian Has Broken The Internet.

November 12, 2014 Celebrity

Who wants to see Kim Kardashian’s bare bot? Answer: NO ONE!!!! But you’ve already broken your eyeballs by staring at that picture above, so you might as well all go away. Anyway, the American publication PaperMag published the picture of Kim’s oiled bot-cheeks on the cover of their winter issue under the banner ‘Break the Internet’. Break the […]

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Thumbnail image for Cynical and Confused:  Kim Kardashian, GQ’s Woman Of The Year Gets Naked.

Cynical and Confused: Kim Kardashian, GQ’s Woman Of The Year Gets Naked.

September 5, 2014 Celebrity

You can’t be a pretentious sack of whining blog starch like me without being confused, cynical or both. For example, take Kim Kardashian winning the GQ Woman of the Year award the other night. That confused me. Wondering if the award had anything to do with her agreeing to get naked for their magazine, that makes me cynical. Believing that […]

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Thumbnail image for Kanye West: The Media Are Disrespecting His Icon.

Kanye West: The Media Are Disrespecting His Icon.

September 4, 2014 Celebrity

Kim Kardashian didn’t become famous just because she had big boobs and a huge ass. No she became famous after taking it all out for the cameras and then allowing her mother to sell the resulting sex tape to Vivid Entertainment for the price of her daughter’s mortal soul. I can only imagine the epic […]

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Thumbnail image for Make Smells Like Kim Kardashian.

Make Smells Like Kim Kardashian.

July 25, 2014 Celebrity

If you want to launch a classic womans fragrance that brings style, sophistication and polish then you’re going to need an advertising agency, some moody selfies and a video clip with a fresh perspective. Take a page out of the shameless fame whore guide by sending your husband off to the local Spy Shop to buy a high-tech surveillance camera. Then get him to […]

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Thumbnail image for My Thoughts On The Butt-Boys Of Brunei: by Kim Kardashian.

My Thoughts On The Butt-Boys Of Brunei: by Kim Kardashian.

June 24, 2014 Celebrity

One day it will become an offence for a thousand cameramen to photograph a woman with an ass like a prehistoric cave buffalo. If that day ever comes I wonder what we’ll be reporting in our trashy blogo-mags? No longer could we report on how Kim Kardashian was seen eating tubs of ice cream and other fattening delights. No more paparazzi pictures showing Kim in […]

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Thumbnail image for Say Something Nice: Kim Kardashian’s Wedding Dress.

Say Something Nice: Kim Kardashian’s Wedding Dress.

May 25, 2014 Celebrity

A world wide wedding occurred in Italy yesterday as Satan’s drowsiest child got married to a frozen-faced goblin. It was reality TV’s event of the century. You know those muffled sounds you heard last night? Well they were coming all the way from the Forte di Belvedere in Florence where this wedding took place. They were the sobbing […]

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Thumbnail image for Kim Kardashian Wedding – Ray J To Give Sex Tape Profits As Wedding Gift.

Kim Kardashian Wedding – Ray J To Give Sex Tape Profits As Wedding Gift.

May 20, 2014 Celebrity

When I was a teenager it was every parents nightmare that one day their children would find the VHS home movie showing them humping on each other. So what did parents do? That’s right, beloved parents everywhere destroyed those tapes and thus maintained their children’s ability to look them straight in the eye. Kids had it good back in the 70’s. Sadly, […]

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Thumbnail image for Kim Kardashian Wedding: La France Dit NON!

Kim Kardashian Wedding: La France Dit NON!

May 19, 2014 Celebrity

One of the coolest things about being extremely wealthy is that you can have anything you damn well like whenever you damn well like so, when it comes to your wedding you can demand the dumbest things that money can buy. Take Kim Kardashian for example. Kim’s getting married next week but instead of holding her […]

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Thumbnail image for Lets Be Proud Of Kim Kardashian Today.

Lets Be Proud Of Kim Kardashian Today.

April 2, 2014 Celebrity

Guess who’s just turned into a bunch of internet meanies today. In a piece by Hanna Flint the world’s most wonderful website, MailonLine have thrown sarcasm and sneers all over their raison d’etre, Kim Kardashian. You can read the whole article here but if you’re expecting to see pictures of Kim’s Thai holiday apartment awash with morning after pills, bloody […]

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Thumbnail image for Here’s Another Kardashain Promotion From The Mailonline.

Here’s Another Kardashain Promotion From The Mailonline.

April 1, 2014 Celebrity

As the beaming sun bathes London in a glorious bright light we find that once again the fat injected backside of Kim Kardashian has waddled onto the web-pages of the hallowed Mailonline. Oh I know, the Mailonline is supposed to be the biggest brightest boldest website in all the known universe but their daily promotion of […]

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Thumbnail image for Kim Kardashian: Two Disasters For The Price Of One.

Kim Kardashian: Two Disasters For The Price Of One.

March 26, 2014 Celebrity

Where to start? There are two disaster stories in one here and they both begin with Kim Kardashian talking gobbledegook nonsense on the Late Night with Seth Meyers show on Tuesday night. One story – Kim’s Dress Disaster. As Kim leaves the TV studio I’m forced to ask, “What the hell is she wearing?” Was that Miss Piggy […]

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