Kim Kardashian

Thumbnail image for My Thoughts On The Butt-Boys Of Brunei: by Kim Kardashian.

My Thoughts On The Butt-Boys Of Brunei: by Kim Kardashian.

June 24, 2014 Celebrity

One day it will become an offence for a thousand cameramen to photograph a woman with an ass like a prehistoric cave buffalo. If that day ever comes I wonder what we’ll be reporting in our trashy blogo-mags? No longer could we report on how Kim Kardashian was seen eating tubs of ice cream and other fattening delights. No more paparazzi pictures showing Kim in […]

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Thumbnail image for Say Something Nice: Kim Kardashian’s Wedding Dress.

Say Something Nice: Kim Kardashian’s Wedding Dress.

May 25, 2014 Celebrity

A world wide wedding occurred in Italy yesterday as Satan’s drowsiest child got married to a frozen-faced goblin. It was reality TV’s event of the century. You know those muffled sounds you heard last night? Well they were coming all the way from the Forte di Belvedere in Florence where this wedding took place. They were the sobbing […]

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Thumbnail image for Kim Kardashian Wedding – Ray J To Give Sex Tape Profits As Wedding Gift.

Kim Kardashian Wedding – Ray J To Give Sex Tape Profits As Wedding Gift.

May 20, 2014 Celebrity

When I was a teenager it was every parents nightmare that one day their children would find the VHS home movie showing them humping on each other. So what did parents do? That’s right, beloved parents everywhere destroyed those tapes and thus maintained their children’s ability to look them straight in the eye. Kids had it good back in the 70′s. Sadly, […]

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Thumbnail image for Kim Kardashian Wedding: La France Dit NON!

Kim Kardashian Wedding: La France Dit NON!

May 19, 2014 Celebrity

One of the coolest things about being extremely wealthy is that you can have anything you damn well like whenever you damn well like so, when it comes to your wedding you can demand the dumbest things that money can buy. Take Kim Kardashian for example. Kim’s getting married next week but instead of holding her […]

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Thumbnail image for Lets Be Proud Of Kim Kardashian Today.

Lets Be Proud Of Kim Kardashian Today.

April 2, 2014 Celebrity

Guess who’s just turned into a bunch of internet meanies today. In a piece by Hanna Flint the world’s most wonderful website, MailonLine have thrown sarcasm and sneers all over their raison d’etre, Kim Kardashian. You can read the whole article here but if you’re expecting to see pictures of Kim’s Thai holiday apartment awash with morning after pills, bloody […]

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Thumbnail image for Here’s Another Kardashain Promotion From The Mailonline.

Here’s Another Kardashain Promotion From The Mailonline.

April 1, 2014 Celebrity

As the beaming sun bathes London in a glorious bright light we find that once again the fat injected backside of Kim Kardashian has waddled onto the web-pages of the hallowed Mailonline. Oh I know, the Mailonline is supposed to be the biggest brightest boldest website in all the known universe but their daily promotion of […]

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Thumbnail image for Kim Kardashian: Two Disasters For The Price Of One.

Kim Kardashian: Two Disasters For The Price Of One.

March 26, 2014 Celebrity

Where to start? There are two disaster stories in one here and they both begin with Kim Kardashian talking gobbledegook nonsense on the Late Night with Seth Meyers show on Tuesday night. One story – Kim’s Dress Disaster. As Kim leaves the TV studio I’m forced to ask, “What the hell is she wearing?” Was that Miss Piggy […]

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Thumbnail image for Anna Wintour Explains The Mess She Made Of Vogue’s April Cover.

Anna Wintour Explains The Mess She Made Of Vogue’s April Cover.

March 23, 2014 Celebrity

The internet exploded into a massive ball of anger this weekend in response to the news that Kanye West and Kim Kardashian had replaced Kate Upton on Vogue Magazine’s April cover. April’s cover also started some shit with Buffy the Vampire Slayer. So, Anna Wintour took time out from editing the next issue of Vogue with Gemma Collins on the cover (she so wishes) to release an […]

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Celebrity Nobody.

February 20, 2014 Celebrity

Watching digital photo artist @Celebs_on_Crack take a hardened politician’s photograph and then deface it until the politico’s trying-not-to-look-gay face oozes puss and lachrymal matter from blood-red eyes is a bit like watching an escort girl expel toothpaste after a particularly busy conference weekend at London’s Excel Centre. Nobody quite knows how Celebs_on_Crack creates his digital disfigurements but anybody remotely famous […]

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Thumbnail image for Kim Kardashian Thinks This Is One Fat Ass.

Kim Kardashian Thinks This Is One Fat Ass.

February 11, 2014 Celebrity

OH, WHERE DO I BEGIN?! When you get to the immigration desk at LAX airport before entering America, an official takes your passport and tells you to turn around and push it out. If you don’t have a double-whopper ass stretching the very limits of the fabric covering it (see above) then forget all about Sunset […]

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Thumbnail image for True Giving – by Kim Kardashian.

True Giving – by Kim Kardashian.

December 11, 2013 Celebrity

A few weeks ago we heard how Kim Kardashian had pulled her fat head out of her ass just long enough to do a good thing in this world. Yes, we were told how Kim had thrown a sack of her old clothes at her eBay page so as to benefit the victims of that awful typhoon in the Philippines. […]

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Thumbnail image for Kanye West: Master of Time, Space and Dumbentia.

Kanye West: Master of Time, Space and Dumbentia.

October 24, 2013 Celebrity

Since I’m no royalist (and don’t write for the Daily Mail) I couldn’t give a dick in the dark that William and Kate christened their tongueless clapper-clawed incontinent yesterday. So given that another boring-ass news day is upon us lets talk about that ridiculous roguish miscreant, Kayne West instead. Yesterday I took time out from […]

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Thumbnail image for More About Kim Kardashian’s Butt.

More About Kim Kardashian’s Butt.

October 21, 2013 Celebrity

After leaving her powerhouse bumchasm all over Instagram last week, Kim Kardashian is celebrating her return to the ‘fatbulous’ pages of the Daily Mirror today by making herself look like a traumatised sea lion who’s been strapped into a straight jacket. Yes, Kim has joined forces with the urchin-snouted lout, photographer Terry Richardson and together they’ve pushed out a […]

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